Dear Shawn Michaels, Please Stop Using Online Name Generators for NXT Superstars

I’m not here to throw shade at the Heartbreak Kid. But as a lifelong WWE fan whose heart once beat for the black-and-gold brand, I’ve got a bone to pick with you, HBK. As NXT’s creative head, you’re shaping the future of wrestling, but the names you’re slapping on these superstars have me betting all my chips that they’re pulled straight from an online name generator. Take a look at these:

Adriana Rizzo, Andre Chase, Arianna Grace, Ashante Adonis, Brinley Reece, Bronco Nima, Brooks Jensen, Carlee Bright, Charlie Dempsey, Cutler James, Dante Chen, Dion Lennox, Edris Enofé, Fallon Henley, Hank Walker, Izzi Dame, Jacy Jayne, Jaida Parker, Jazmyn Nyx, Je’Von Evans, Josh Briggs, Karmen Petrovic, Kelani Jordan, Luca Crusifino, Lucien Price, Malik Blade, Myles Borne, Oro Mensah, Penina Tuielaepa, Stevie Turner, Tank Ledger, Tatum Paxley, Tavion Heights, Thea Hail, Tyson Dupont, Tyriek Igwe, Wendy Choo, Wren Sinclair…

I feel like I’m Stone Cold watching a 2003 Lance Storm match. BOORRINGGG.

I get it. Those are the names Legal could clear. But they sound like the names for a create-a-wrestler in WWE 2K. It’s like you’re scrolling a baby name website at 2 a.m., picking whatever pops up under “Unique.” Like Michael Jordan said, “Stop it. Get some help.”

Let me tell you something you already know: names matter in wrestling. They’re the first image a superstar projects. Kane. Sting. The Undertaker. Mankind. Edge. CM Punk. Rey Mysterio. Vader. The Rock. Hulk Hogan. Andre the Giant. Who didn’t just call him “Stone Cold” when referring to Steve Austin? Same goes for The Macho Man. Oooo, yeah! AEW piques my interest when I see Hook, Orange Cassidy, Danhausen, Luchasaurus (I refuse to call him by his new name), and Wardlow. My point is that too many NXT names feel like they’re trying to sound cool without meaning anything. Give us names that feel creative, imaginative, and fun—not like they were generated by AI.

You’re juggling a roster of hungry talent, trying to avoid trademarks and make everyone stand out. But I’m begging you, HBK, ditch the online name generators. Tap into that creative fire you had when you were stealing shows at WrestleMania. Sit down with your team, crack open a few bottles of Prime, dump that garbage down the drain, and then brainstorm names that scream character, not college gymnast from North Dakota with an NIL deal.

And here’s the real kicker: I hate that I’m starting to expect these clunky names. NXT’s where I go to watch new stars being born. But every time a debut trailer drops, I brace myself for another “Zayden Quill” or “Khyron Blaze.” It’s like watching a favorite show jump the shark. I’m not ready to admit NXT’s losing its edge, but these names aren’t helping. You’re forcing me to question my faith in the brand that gave me those early TakeOver epics.

Maybe there’s hope. Maybe you’re testing us, Shawn, seeing if we’ll still cheer for “Kianna James” despite forgetting the name as soon as it leaves the announcer’s lips. Or maybe you’re daring us to demand better, to chant for names that match the talent’s fire. I’m holding out for a turnaround, for an NXT where every debut feels like a movie poster, not a spam email subject line. That’s wrestling, right? Believing in something bigger, even when it’s a little ridiculous.

So, Shawn, please stop using online name generators. Grab a pen, channel that HBK swagger, and give your NXT stars names that’ll echo in arenas and stadiums for decades to come. I don’t know what the answer is, but I feel like that kid on the tricycle from The Incredibles when Mr. Incredible (you, HBK) says, “What do you want?” and the kid just says, “I don’t know. Something amazing, I guess!”

I’m not the superhero, Shawn. You are. So make the names something amazing, I guess!

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to name my third child using a top-tier prompt I found online.