Before we begin, I had a random thought.

Those who watched in 1999 might remember the WrestleMania Rage Party the night before XV. If you do, I’m sure Shane McMahon being drunk / coked-out comes to mind. That and Vince’s dance moves during Issac Hayes’ performance. BTW, it was a song from South Park.

Things were so much easier without cancel culture getting in the way.

Now, what are you all doing this weekend? What do I think about it?

United States Championship

John Cena vs. Austin Theory (c)

It might not be best for Theory, but what if Cena did win? Why not? He could just drop it back to Theory on Monday and be done with it.

Mr. A-Town needs more work before going for a main event push. The man just isn’t there yet. Losing to Cena could be a catalyst for something bigger. Now, Bret Hart had a hand in ‘making’ Stone Cold Steve Austin, but he was full-time. 

It’s a toss up here.

Winner: Austin Theory

Seth Rollins vs. Logan Paul

If he hadn’t burned his bridges, I feel like it would’ve been Shane against one of these two this year.

I wanna say this one is a potential show stealer, but if ever since that cash-in 8 years ago, Seth hasn’t really beaten that moment on this stage. Maybe 35 when he beat Brock Lesnar.

Winner: Seth Rollins

Trish Stratus, Lita, and Becky Lynch vs. Damage CTRL

Can we please end Damage CRTL, or at least kick Bayley out?

I’m not too enthusiastic. This bout is on the card because nostalgia and they can’t leave Becky off.

Winner: Damage CTRL

Rey Mysterio vs. Dominik Mysterio

First, a big thank you to Creative for not rushing this out.

The ‘mark’ in us has been waiting for this. Rey will likely play up his reluctance here. Dominik pushed the mother of all buttons – I know – to get this match, but Rey will still hesitate to give his rotten son what he deserves. And if she’s there, how much will Rhea be a factor?

Winner: Dominik

Smackdown Women’s Championship 

Rhea Ripley vs. Charlotte Flair (c)

One of the two matches that should close Night 1.

It’s standard WWE logic at work. They know the Queen doesn’t play the hero well, but they made her that because of who she’s up against.

Ripley is undoubtedly a despicable heel. Yet this is WrestleMania. She won’t be one to the fans. You have to wonder if the Mysterio’s feud will play into it, but they haven’t gone out of their way to integrate both angles, so why start now?

Winner: Rhea Ripley

Undisputed Tag Team Championship

Kevin Owens vs. Sami Zayn vs. The Usos (c)

If I had to choose, this would end the show on Night 1. Why shouldn’t it?

Without question, just about anything involving the Bloodline has made up some of their best storytelling in the last three years. The group is ready to come apart. Even if Jimmy and Jey chose their blood, there’s no guarantee it’ll last. 

Could they swerve us? Have Sami turn against KO and make it out to be a long con? I get the feeling one of these teams won’t be very “Ucey” for long. Yeah, I said that.

Winners: Kevin and Sami

Intercontinental Championship

Drew McIntyre vs. Sheamus vs. Gunther (c)

Massive potential for a classic. If you saw Clash at the Castle, you’re likely excited. 

Vince McMahon was about to write Gunther off when he had to call it quits. Now he seems to be a main eventer in waiting. He could lose without losing his stock, but neither Sheamus or Drew need the win. The former has never held the IC title. Let’s make him a maybe.

Winner: Gunther

Hell in a Cell

Finn Balor vs. Edge

We’re getting the Demon as a heel. That might work? We could be getting the return of the Brood? If you don’t know that, I don’t blame you. Edge was known for the ladder matches, not as a would-be vampire.

A win by Edge could signal the end of Judgment Day. Ripley is likely moving to Smackdown. The Mysterio feud does fine on its own. It’s time for Damien Priest to go solo again.

Winner: Edge

Brock Lesnar vs. Omos

It couldn’t be Bobby Lashley or Steve Austin. I would’ve taken LA Knight.

Winner: Brock Lesnar

Undisputed WWE Universal Championship

Cody Rhodes vs. Roman Reigns

It’s time. 

The story began one year ago. The American Nightmare returned, and despite having a hand in launching their biggest rival since WCW, he was treated as a folk hero. It’s time. He needs to leave Sofi Stadium with those two titles.

How will this affect Roman is the long term? The Tribal Chief has gone over three years without being pinned, and here’s a surprise. His combined days as a world champion is higher than John Cena.

You’ve likely heard the rumors about a new title. Naturally, the IWC wants either the Winged Eagle or the Big Gold belt. 

Winner: Cody Rhodes

Ok then. 

Don’t mess with the X.