IWC Scum — Not Even Three Hours Can Save SmackDown

Welcome back to the column that puts the incessant whining and complaining in IWC. I’m the birthday boy SkitZ, and this is a gift for the masses of assholes who indulge my mad ramblings. 

For some reason, I woke up annoyed today. Feathers officially ruffled. Actually I know the reason, and it’s gnawing at me like a sappy Hoobastank song. SmackDown is the recurring root of my anger. Despite really wanting to like the program, its showrunners have done us dirty on so many occasions that I can’t even treat these promising newcomers from NXT as a mood-enhancing shot in the arm without pessimistic SkitZ intervening. Last night’s episode was a step in the right direction, but do you honestly expect them to match that pace in the weeks to come? As someone who’s been a wrestling fan for upwards of 30 years, it’s rough going from the days of the SmackDown Six to Road Dogg and his inept writing staff dragging this show through the mud week after week. Truthfully, adding an hour back to the blue brand concerns me more than it excites me. 

Now surely there’s some of you out there who enjoy Friday Night SmackDown in its current form. I’m just curious what it is about the show heading into 2026 that you genuinely enjoy?

Is it these groan-inducing feuds that’ve stretched on for so long that they may very well outlast Naomi’s entire pregnancy? Aleister versus Damian is a program which began mid-summer, and has played out like a slow-building horror flick void of suspense or drama. Well there was that one point where Black used his fiery Puerto Rican wife to pull a Halloween Havoc ‘98 on Priest, but even the infamous Hogan/Warrior feud had more heat than this shit. We witnessed 4 matches between Aleister and Damian in 2025, which should’ve been plenty to wrap up a rivalry that nobody’s demanding more of, and yet they squeezed a fifth (and hopefully final) showdown out of it that meandered into the New Year. From a last man standing bout, to a mixed tag including Rhea and Zelina, to an Ambulance Match they sprung on us the evening of. You’d expect Hell in a Cell or something along those lines given how many months have been devoted to this personal beef, but the sad reality is that it neither warrants nor deserves such a gimmick. 

Road Dogg & Co. limped this crap along for so many weeks that Priest’s injuries have piled up in the meantime and extended the storyline far past its natural expiration date. And for what? So Damian can finally take a lengthy sabbatical and miss WrestleMania while Aleister jobs to Randy Orton at said event? What a career boosting feud for both men. And to think, it all started over Black bullying Priest’s autistic buddy R-Truth.  

Alright, enough negativity on my part. Please faithful SmackDown viewer, tell me what you love about the weekly program. Is it the tragic demise of a once flourishing tag team scene? Between February and August of last year, the men were putting everybody else on the blue brand to shame. The likes of DIY, Fraxiom, Rey Fenix, Andrade, Los Garza and the Motor City Machine Guns treated us to a run of show-stealing performances that were bookended by a pair of epic TLC matches. And at the center of all that greatness was Montez Ford & Angelo Dawkins, but where the hell are they now? What happened to the endlessly teased breakup between The Street Profits? Did Dawkins reject the idea of them splitting because he knows as we all do how fast his career will tank as a result? Is Montez at home playing nurse for his wife and her mangled hand? Seriously, how long are they gonna keep us in the dark on this sordid little affair???

Then there’s this whole matter of The Wyatt Sicks rolling in and derailing all the groundwork that had been laid down over the preceding months. The group returned in late May and appeared to be a strong addition to SmackDown’s tag division; ultimately dethroning The Street Profits a few weeks before SummerSlam. But since that moment? Uncle Howdy and his Monster Squad have become complete afterthoughts, despite being the reigning champions. The Wyatt Sicks began targeting The MFT’s months ago, so why the fuck are we just getting around to an actual match now? And of all the possible scenarios on the blue brand, Lumis & Gacy wrestling two of Solo’s goons might just be the worst. It screams Main Event, and no, I’m not referring to the closing match on SmackDown. If this all leads to Temu Bloodline winning the Tag Titles and Tama Tonga foreshadowing himself becoming United States Champion, I may have to opt for alternate programming on Friday nights. 

But hey, the US Title open challenges have proven to be a bright spot! Between Dragunov’s killer defenses, the jackass angle with Ciampa, and Carmelo finally getting his due, SmackDown’s midcard is obviously in good hands. Aside from that though, what is there to sink your teeth into? Perhaps the constant stop-start booking of beloved journeyman Sami Zayn? The quirky underdog who was the talk of the industry 3 years ago, before he became a mere side chapter in Cody finishing his story. Sami’s experienced a handful of pushes and setbacks since his Honorary Uce days, with the move to SmackDown in August serving as the latest instance of him recapturing that lost mojo. 

Yeah well, RIP to whatever momentum Zayn had gathered while making the United States Title relevant again. Much like his quest to become World Champion a year ago that led to a string of losses and missing Mania altogether, Sami put over The MFT’s in late November and then proceeded to fall off the face of the Earth for 5 weeks. Not exactly an encouraging sign for a guy who once seemed like a possible candidate to win the 2026 Royal Rumble in Saudi. Unless this is some of that lazy MITB reverse psychology where they book the eventual winner like shit to throw people off the scent. If that’s the case, then job well done!        

Okay listen, my intention isn’t to be overly harsh here. My mind’s just trying to wrap itself around what you see that I’m apparently blind to. Is it the inability to properly showcase two women’s divisions at the same time? Prior to 2025, the ladies’ tag scene never received any type of legitimate love. Then Triple H woke up one day within the past 12 months and decided to make a concerted effort in righting that wrong. The only problem is Hunter put all his eggs in one basket. RAW’s done a better balancing act, but the attention paid to SmackDown’s tag division compared to the WWE Women’s and United States Title scenes has been laughably one-sided.  

During Giulia’s first run as US Champion, her only contenders were locker room mainstays B-Fab and Michin. Jade dethroned Tiffany two months ago, and she’s in the exact same position; just killing screen time squashing the same chumps over and over again. SmackDown’s creative team handled the loss of their third hour so poorly that they somehow managed to make Zelina’s reign look stronger than Giulia’s, despite the latter being superior in every category besides the English language. The absences of Belair and Stratton have no doubt hurt the blue brand, but the larger issue is so many top names being tied up in the tag team division, and WWE failing terribly at rotating them in and out of the World Title picture so that Cargill, Chelsea Green, etc. aren’t feuding with the same 2 or 3 names for 6 months straight. Given how many women are currently on the roster, the math just ain’t mathing. 

Dammit, look at me going off on another tangent. Apologies. But pray tell, what keeps you glued to the TV until Friday Night SmackDown goes off the air? So you can “Woah Oh” along with Cody Rhodes like an idiot? Or is it to watch WWE systematically fail Drew McIntyre? You know, the guy who the company’s been Dolph Zigglering the credibility out of with each passing year. It doesn’t matter how witty or culturally relevant Drew is with his tweets. Or how clutch his promos are no matter the show or opponent. Or how skilled he’s become at delivering bangers in big match situations. When you’re always losing or eating the pin against every other top guy on the roster, it slowly kills the crowd’s belief in you doing something transcendent. They lose faith in you as an onscreen character, and they’ll ultimately stop caring. Unfortunately, McIntyre is coming dangerously close to crossing that threshold.  

I recall saying the same thing nearly 4 months ago and nothing has changed, aside from Drew failing to wrestle the WWE Championship away from Cody on multiple occasions. We get it – Rhodes is Hunter’s pure whitemeat babyfaced superhero. He ended The Tribal Chief’s historic reign. John Cena passed the torch to him. That’s all well and understood, but it doesn’t mean Cody needs to win every single feud and hold the World Title for at least 300 days of every calendar year. I beg you to spread the wealth! Remember the good old days when the top star was constantly chasing, and Vince had to keep finding inventive ways to keep the belt just out of his grasp? Let Drew screw over Cody, so Rhodes can go off and finish his trilogy with Roman while McIntyre defends the title at WM42 against a megastar like LA Knight who’s long overdue for the rub. 

We’re so conditioned to heel Drew never winning the big one that I honestly can’t envision him leaving Berlin, Germany next weekend with the WWE Championship. It’s nothing more than a mere pipe dream. The three stages of hell stipulation feels like a dirty trick; a means for McIntyre to score a visible victory over the champ without Cody having to actually drop the title. And speaking of a lack of imagination, who in God’s name came up with the stipulations for these falls? Drew picking an ordinary wrestling contest and a steel cage match where there’s “no escape or no interference” makes him sound like a clueless fucktard who hasn’t learned a goddamn thing.  

Seeing as how the company’s created a gimmick out of Drew’s old demons coming back to haunt him at the worst possible moment, I’m fully expecting Jacob Fatu to return during the third fall and cost McIntyre the match. Some sort of ill-timed shenanigans that spell doom for the Scottish Psychopath. And if by some miracle Drew does manage to pull off the upset, odds are he drops the strap back to Rhodes at the Rumble. The powers-that-be would never allow him to hold Cody’s pride and joy for any longer than that. Curse you WWE for turning The Chosen One into a jobber to the stars. This is a travesty of justice! An unforgivable offense that no welcome back RKO or Matt Cardona appearance can fix! I hope you perpetual gaslighters burn in hell!!

…Ahem. Pardon the outburst. What was it you liked about SmackDown again?