NoDQ.com > Columns > RD: Recap of "I'm A Celebrity!..." Twelve Posted by Raging Demons on 06/25/2009 at 10:17 AM
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We see the hosts Damien & Myleene again who greet us to the beginning of "finale week". (RD: And the end of my self-inflicted torture! Woo-hoo!) Myleene hypes that there will be fierce competition and surprises galore for the Celebrities & the viewing public. Damien hypes their "Thunderdome" event called "The Last Chance Saloon" where "Two May Enter, One May Leave." But first. Let's pick up to the moment when Janice Dickinson gets eliminated. (RD: I call it "Happy Fun Day.")
Back to the point where Myleene was telling camp that two Celebrities will be going home. Lou mentions in confession that the Double Elimination was weighing very heavy on the entire camp. When Damien mentioned he had the voting results, Lou mentions in confession that even though Salley & himself had Immunity they wondered who was it that was going home. When it was revealed that Holly was going home. In confession Sanjaya was heartbroken to see Holly go while Salley will miss Holly for being a "breath of fresh air." Back at camp Sanjaya is laying in his bed depressed now that Holly is gone. Torrie gives him a peck on the head to get better soon. In confession Salley sees Sanjaya's heartbreak as real and he feels for the guy. Sanjaya admits in confession that Holly wanted to stay on the show and she was keeping him spiritually strong. When it was down to Mrs. Blago and Janice for elimination, Mrs. Blago admitted in confession she was "crossing her fingers" hoping not to get eliminated. (RD: Of course everybody that saw the previous episode knew that Janice was going to be eliminated thanks to...Bad Editing!) When it was revealed that Janice was eliminated. In confession Mrs. Blago acted relieved that she wasn't going home, Sanjaya was even more heartbroken that he lost two friends, and Salley wanted to jump and down to celebrate but couldn't because that would be rude. When Janice left camp, Salley yelled the ole Martin Luther King line of "Free At Last, Free At Last! Thank God Almighty We Are Free At Last!" In confession Torrie admits that with Janice now gone, things will be peaceful. Lou gets the camp to listen to silence. Reason that Lou did is that now Janice is gone the jungle will be a lot more quieter now. In confession Torrie says the best thing about Janice gone is not hearing her hacking phlegm. Salley says to the remaining women & in confession that "America" did the right thing in keeping Torrie & Mrs. Blago. In confession Lou thinks the competition is picking up. Salley says to everybody in camp that he's not afraid of anybody no more, so bring it!
Commercial Break 1
Back to the hosts as they hype that one more Celebrity will be going home thanks to the "Thunderdome". But first. Someone wants to quit the game. (RD: Right now? When the show is going to end in a couple of episodes? Da Hell?!?)
Back at camp where Torrie is admitting that she's happy she will make it to the "final week" because she thinks a woman can win this. In confession Stephen basically said that he "lost his smile." Stephen admits to the camp that he was hoping he was going to get eliminated so he can go home. Stephen is about to has his "jungle breakdown" by saying the only reason he's on the show was to have fun, he was surprised that he made it this far, he misses his family, and he wants to quit the show. (RD: Figures. Stephen Baldwin never wins a Reality TV show he's on because he's a poser. Quick and simple. If you want to "have fun" Stephen play the game out to the end, not cry about it. Yeesh!) Stephen basically says that he doesn't want to be here and that's a problem.
It's morning again at camp. Lou noticed in confession that sometime in the night a spider bit him in the forehead around his eye leaving three bites. Mrs. Blago noticed a bite right near the part of her leg where thigh and butt meets, so she asks Stephen & Salley that if there's a spider bite near the area because she feels a stinger in there. (RD: OW!) Lou admits in confession that he sprays whatever parts of his body that he can but somehow the bugs find an unprotected spot.
Back at camp. Torrie complains that she misses Holly where Sanjaya acts like a guy who got dumped at The Prom saying that he misses Holly. Torrie says that all of the people in camp are the people that want to be here. Lou then asks where Stephen is. Stephen is hanging out on the bridge, but in confession Stephen says that he quits the show. (RD: Wuss! Once again this Reality TV Show has more quitters than any other show that I had ever seen!) In confession Torrie can see it that Stephen doesn't want to stay. Stephen then tells camp that he's leaving. Lou says in confession that he is shocked that Stephen is quitting, while Torrie says in confession that she's shocked that Stephen is leaving when the show is about to end soon. In confession Torrie says the whole show has been nothing but a roller coaster ride. The rest of the camp are in the river trying to figure out why Stephen is quitting when they are so close to the end, while Stephen is sitting quietly in camp. Mrs. Blago also adds by saying that by quitting that your also letting down the people that voted for Stephen & his charity and that is wrong. In confession Stephen basically admits that he is about to quit, he will only miss the people in camp and not everything else around camp. Salley says to Stephen that if he leaves and Janice returns he will hunt him down like the dog that he is.
Commercial Break 2
Back to the hosts where they mention that the Celebrities had endured basically everything and the kitchen sink. Damien calls on Myleene's experience when she was on the British version of the show how the Celebrities are feeling right now. Myleene says that even though they know that the show is about to end, you kinda feel that the competition is turning up and one by one you start to loose this little family unit that you've created. Damien mentions that the end for one of the Celebrities seem like a lifetime away.
Back at camp. Stephen walks in camp and starts to pack because he's quitting. The camp acts shocked that Stephen is really leaving. Mrs. Blago said in confession one of the reasons she's not quitting is that her kids are watching the show and she doesn't want to show them a bad example. (RD: No Comment.) So Stephen hugs everybody at camp, walks across the bridge, and leaves the show. Lou said in confession getting eliminated means it was out of your hands, but quitting the show means you let the jungle & the show beat you. (RD: And Lou means you Stephen, Fran, and Especially Heidi & Spencer Pratt. Sure they left because Heidi was sick but they quit the first time around.) Lou said Stephen did a lame thing. In confession Salley said he was disappointed in Stephen and he didn't learn anything in the jungle. Torrie admits to Mrs. Blago in camp that in less than a day they lost three people. In confession Torrie said that she's in not a quitter. Salley says to the camp that it kinda reveals to a person what they really are when they quit. Sanjaya said the whole thing was disappointing. Torrie even said that if she quit her whole family would be angry at her. (RD: Not to mention all of her fans that she had in WWE.) Sanjaya is somewhat angry in confession that Holly wanted to stay and she got eliminated yet Stephen didn't want to stay and he quits. Salley basically says that Stephen "can't finish anything". (RD: I say he's a poser.) Salley said he thought of quitting but he fought it. In confession Salley says "tough times never last, but tough people do." Torrie wonders to Salley if Stephen would regret quitting. Salley said he'll blame "God" for it. In confession Salley sees himself getting closer to victory.
Back to the hosts where they recap the camp's disappointment over Stephen Baldwin quitting like a punk. Damien mentions thanks to Stephen quitting, Mother Nature is hoarked off!
Back at camp where another rain storm is starting. (RD: More rain references. Again?!?) In confession Torrie said the rain is getting worse in the jungle. The camp sees that the rain storm is coming their way. Torrie said in confession that thanks to the rain storm, the camp had to spend the night back in the Confession Room again. Torrie also said in confession that they were so bored the camp was starting to tell a story to kill the boredom. Salley starts to tell the story of a "debonair cat" walking through a jungle and the villain of the story sounded a lot like Janice Dickinson and her time in camp. Well to make a long story short, "the people" decided to vanquish the villain and send her across the bridge. The End.
Commercial Break 3
Back to the hosts where they smack bugs off their bodies. They hype the "finale" & the upcoming "Thunderdome" event later on in the show. The hosts mention that thanks to Stephen Baldwin quitting, they need to fill that hole.
Back at camp. Salley has a scroll. The scroll said that thanks to Stephen Baldwin quitting, (RD: For being a poser punk ass that he was.) a Celebrity that has left the show can come back into camp. Each Celebrity that left the show will come back and plea their case why they want back, then the camp will vote on who will stay. Lou thinks that's a good twist while Salley knew this was coming. (RD: I guess he's going to have to hunt Stephen Baldwin down like a dog now.) Salley then says that whomever they take back will have a huge advantage in the game since they are well rested and well fed. The camp is listening to Salley thinking whomever is going to return make sure its someone that will do really bad when they come back. Lou doesn't care who will come back, Torrie & Sanjaya thinks its unfair someone that left will get to come back. So the first Celebrity to want back into camp is Janice. Janice is basically begging on her knees acting like someone that was dumped by an ex-boyfriend that she really liked about coming back to camp. Janice said that she can't act. (RD: But you can lie. Same difference.) Janice is begging to come back into camp because she sees them as "her family" while almost crying. Then Janice breaks down asking the camp to PLEASE take her back. Janice then hugged and kissed everyone and left. The next Celebrity that came into camp asking to come back is Holly. Holly is running back into camp. Upon seeing Holly, Sanjaya gets up and hugs Holly. Holly and the camp hug each other. Apparently Holly has news for the camp. Janice somehow "didn't tell" (RD: Or more like "forgot to her best advantage". Maybe it's more like the thing she can't do; "Act".) the camp that they must choose between Janice and herself for who can return to camp. Holly wants back because she missed all of them and she was crying ever since she left, she didn't want to be the "Cry Baby" of the show. Holly wants to be back on the show instead of being in a hotel. Holly was making jokes that it was making all of the camp laugh. Holly misses everyone of them but at least she got to see the camp one more time before the finale show.
Commercial Break 4
Back to the hosts as they hype the "Thunderdome" later on in the show. (RD: If they keep this us I'm going to bust the song Tina Turner performed for the movie.) The hosts recap that thanks to Stephen Baldwin quitting the show, the camp must pick either nice girl Holly or the thieving liar Janice to return to camp.
Back at camp where they are discussing whether they should return Holly or Janice. The camp is definitely considering taking Holly back but is not sure if Holly would win the game.
We see Janice at the river waiting for the camp vote. Janice is breaking down & crying in the river, in confession Janice hopes for the camp to take her back because she's not a "witch". (RD: Uh...Janice. You are.) The camp received the scroll which might contain the camp vote. Janice walks back into camp promising a transformation via confession. (RD: The only transformation I'm sure of in my life is when Optimus Prime transforms from truck to robot.) The scroll did contain the camp vote on whether Janice or Holly would come back. And with a 5-0 vote. The camp has decided to let Holly return to camp. Janice graciously (RD: Huh?) shakes Holly's hand while in confession Janice said she's proud of who she is and she has no "BFF's". (RD: Urm...Because you were acting like the late Eddie Guerrero. You Lied, You Cheated, And You Stole.) In confession Lou said the reason Holly was voted to return because with the game about to end soon they didn't need the drama. (RD: And Janice brings a LOT of drama.) Janice hugs the camp and walks on the bridge leaving camp while in confession Janice is proud (RD: Say what?) of who she is and "I'm A Celebrity! Get Me Out Of Here!" (RD: Words she knows quite well by now.) Holly is happy in confession about being let back into camp. Holly starts to hug everybody in camp with such sheer joy while in confession Sanjaya yells out "Holly's Back!" followed by some fist pumps in the air.
Back at camp it looked like nothing has changed as Sanjaya & Holly are laying next to each other in their hammocks. Holly said to Sanjaya that she thought her elimination was all a dream but now that she's back it feels like nothing has changed. In confession once again Holly said she's happy back at camp, especially since she missed Sanjaya. While Sanjaya admits in confession that he loves Holly. Lou proclaimed in camp that "all is right in the world." Lou says in confession that Holly makes Sanjaya happy and it looks like "the beginning of a beautiful friendship". Torrie admits in confession that she's happy to see Holly back but Sanjaya especially since he was acting depressed. Sanjaya & Holly profess how much they missed each other, while Holly says in confession that she never knew how much she missed Sanjaya but now that she's back in camp there will be no regrets in missing him again.
Holly & Sanjaya are doing the dishes. Holly dares Sanjaya to do a cannonball. Holly says in confession that she thinks she knows who Sanjaya has a crush for. (RD: The hosts said it was Torrie. OH!) Sanjaya basically does the "Okay if I do this what are you going to do for me" routine. Holly whispers something in Sanjaya's ear which we have no clue what it's all about. Then we find out that Holly is taking off her clothes (RD: Bow Chika Wow-wow!) to nothing but bra and panties and decides to take a dip in the river with Sanjaya. Holly walks along the slippery rocks in the river to get to Sanjaya and they hold each other in the river. (RD: Hrm...) Torrie asked Sanjaya & Holly if they had a good time and both of them said "yes." Sanjaya basically is proud of himself in confession. (RD: You think Sanjaya got a piece of Holly's ass? If that happened there goes all the "Gay" accusations, but the "Bi" accusations still continue!)
Commercial Break 5
Back to the hosts. Damien hype that the Celebrities are locked in "combat" in order to claim the title of "King/Queen of The Jungle". (RD: Whoa Damien! This is a piddly little bad Reality TV Show. Not "Gladiator".) Myleene mentions that in the "finale" that all the Celebrities who quit or were eliminated were return. So expect Daniel Baldwin & Janice Dickinson to throw down while The Pratts create drama. The hosts mention why would any of the Celebrities would do this? The reason? Charity!
The Celebrities shill in confession to please donate to charity. (RD: I'm not going to recap all of this. Just go to NBC.com if you want to donate okay?)
Back to the hosts again where they shill for the viewing audience to please donate. (RD: I already put up the link to NBC.com! What more do you people want?!?) But first. It's Food Trial time.
Back at camp Salley reads the scroll. It's Food Trial time and it's called "Head Of Horror". Lou jokes to Holly basically saying (RD: In my words) "you picked a GREAT time to come back." Holly mentions in confession her goal is to destroy all the Trials out there. Holly mentions that it's time to "get back to work" as all of the Celebrities leave camp to go to the Food Trial.
The Celebrities arrive at the Food Trial where the hosts are. Damien talks to Holly about missing the camp and Holly said she missed it so much. Myleene welcomes Holly back. The reward for this Food Trial is a Cheeseburger, Onion Rings, & Fries. (RD: That's not a Cheeseburger. It looks more like a Big Mac on Steroids!) Here's how the Food Trial works. Two at a time the Celebrities will stick their head inside a plastic box that contains all sorts of creepy crawlies. Using only their mouths they must remove the two Stars that are tied up and push the Stars out in the right slots. The fastest will move on to the finals. The three Celebrities that are left will compete for the Food Trial Reward. If a Celebrity quits whomever is left in the round must finish their round. The sole survivor gets the Food Trial reward. (RD: Another "Fear Factor" stunt that they copied. Yeesh!)
The Food Trial starts with Holly & Mrs. Blago. The staff reveal their boxes. The boxes for this round contain stick bugs, cockroaches, & beetles. Mrs. Blago quits forcing Holly to finish the round. Holly gets the red Star untied first and tries to stick it in through the correct slot but somehow is stuck. Holly then concentrates on the yellow Star, manages to untie it, and place it through the correct slot. Holly returns to the red Star, which at that moment Damien mentions that her hands are shaking. Holly put the Star through the hold and she advances to the finals. Next up is Salley & Sanjaya. Sanjaya starts to trash talk saying that he opes there are tarantulas in the box and that makes Salley laugh. Salley stars to fake that he has cramps on his back & shoulder. Damien is trying to get Salley back into the game. Salley complains that this Food Trial is "stupid" (RD: John Salley. Great sport isn't he?). The staff reveal the boxes and they are full of spiders. To which Salley says...
Salley: "You got to be out of your rabid ass mind?!?"
Commercial Break 6
Back to the hosts as they hype the "Thunderdome" once more. (RD: I said I was going to do it. So here goes. "We Don't Need Another Hero! We Don't Need To Know The Way Home! All We Want Is Life Beyond...The Thunderdome!") Damien mentions that before the commercial break we were in the middle of a Food Trial where Mrs. Blago quit round 1 and in round 2 Salley confronts his arachnophobia again. Its time to see if Salley quits or not.
Back at the Food Trial. Where Salley quotes the Food Trial perfectly. Round 2 starts. Sanjaya pushes his head through the box while Salley slowly gets his head in there. Sanjaya gets the red Star out of his box in pretty fast amount of time while Salley is taking his time with the red Star. While Salley pushes the red Star out of his box Sanjaya manages to beat him by pushing both Stars out so he advances to the finals. Next up is Torrie & Lou. (RD: The "Clash Of The Titans" continue!) The boxes for this round contain snakes (RD: "I'm Sick & Tired Of These Mutha F-Ing Snakes!") and all sorts of lizards. Round 3 begins. Torrie is the first one in the box. (RD: That's what he & she said!) Both of them are at the red Star. Torrie is having problems pushing the red Star in the slot while Lou almost has it out. Torrie is having trouble so he go to the yellow Star while Lou's red Star is stuck to he moves to the yellow Star. Lou's head moves so that the red Star falls out of the slot, he pushes the yellow Star out of the slot. Lou beats Torrie and advances to the finals. Torrie is angry that Lou kicked her ass again. The finals are here. Holly vs Sanjaya vs Lou. And in the finals boxes are actually filled with tarantulas. To which Salley said.
Salley *motioning towards Torrie*: "Thank God I'm sitting over here by you!"
The finals begin. Holly quits while Lou gets to the red Star. Sanjaya works on the red Star but somehow is having problems sticking it in the slot. (RD: Unfortunately, that's what she said!) Lou gets the red Star out of the box and goes for the yellow Star. Sanjaya quits leaving Lou to finish the finals so he can have that reward. Lou is trying to push that yellow Star out of the box but there are tarantulas literally blocking him. There are tarantulas crawling all over Lou's face. Lou doesn't give up, pushes the yellow Star out which means Lou wins the Food Trial and the Cheeseburger! The Celebrities head back to camp.
Commercial Break 7
Back to the hosts where they mention that the Celebrities are "dropping like flies". (RD: Well some of them quit for being wussies.) Myleene mentions that it could be the basic diet of rice & beans that's the reason the Celebrities are running.
Back at camp where Lou grabs a giant board of some kind. Apparently the board is a list of the camp's weight before they started the show and the weight loss during the show. Salley placed a scale near the board so the camp can weigh themselves. In confession Salley admits that he doesn't see a lot of body fat on him now. Salley weighs himself as 235 lbs. Salley weighted 256 lbs. before the show so Salley lost 21 pounds in the jungle! Mrs. Blago weighs 122 lbs. Mrs. Blago weighed 132 lbs. before the show so Mrs. Blago lost 10 pounds in the jungle. Sanjaya weighs 124 lbs. Sanjaya weighed 132 lbs. before the show so Sanjaya lost 8 pounds in the jungle. (RD: And it's hard to believe since Sanjaya looks very scrawny.) Torrie weighs 139 lbs. Before the show Torrie weighed 132 lbs. so Torrie gained 7 pounds! The camp, and Torrie in confession, are curious as to how Torrie actually gained weight. Salley thinks in confession that Torrie is working out in camp about 3 times a week so all those added pounds are actually added muscle. (RD: That sounds true. Referencing one of Mick Foley's books where he was "somehow fit" before he had an injury and when he weighed himself he didn't loose a pound. Foley's wife, a former supermodel so she should know about fitness, said that Foley lost muscle not fat.) Holly weighs 123 lbs. Before the show Holly weighed 132 lbs. so Holly lost 9 pounds, but she was eliminated, not on the show for long, and came back to camp. In confession Holly is happy for her lost weight. Lou weighs 161 lbs. Before the show Lou weighed 176 lbs. so Lou lost 15 pounds in the jungle. Holly congratulates Salley for him since he lost the most weight. Salley says in confession that he might be "The Biggest Loser" but he is a jungle "Biggest Loser." (RD: Oh great. Cross promotion. Also. Don't give "The Biggest Loser" any ideas! Next thing you know we might have "The Biggest Loser: Jungle Version!")
It's nightfall at camp and Lou walks into the jungle carrying his Food Trial reward. Lou eats the Cheeseburger (RD: Which looks like it's bigger than his head!) with such joy. The camp is drooling over Lou & his Cheeseburger. Lou said in confession that was probably the best meal he had in the jungle for awhile and he thinks he gained all the pounds that he lost. Torrie & Sanjaya are all over Lou as he eats the Cheeseburger. Lou said in confession it was hard eating that Cheeseburger but he did finish it. Lou finishes the Cheeseburger, stands up, and gives a groan for being so full.
Back to the hosts. The hosts made fun of the Cheeseburger being a lot bigger than it was because of TV. The hosts mention that each Celebrity gets to bring one personal item in the jungle. So what does John Salley bring? A camera!
Back at camp where Salley brings out his camera again (RD: If you read the previous recap John Salley had a digital camera with him taking pictures.) to show to the camp. First picture to show is of Frangela. Torrie mentions in confession about Salley bringing a camera and taking pictures. Salley mentions that he has been taking pictures since he was 15. More photos this time of The Pratts in the airplane heading to the jungle, The Pratts hanging out with Janice, Lou with Angela & Mrs. Blago doing laundry. Salley shows another picture of Stephen looking cool with Spencer trying to get into the photo. In confession Torrie thinks it was a pretty good idea of Salley having that camera to share moments about what they were thinking at that time. More photos were shown of Spencer & Stephen at Spencer's "baptismal", Janice looking worried, and Lou's happy in his Leadership bed. Salley shows another picture of him & Mrs. Blago in the airplane heading to the jungle. Salley shows more pictures of The Pratts sleeping, and another photo of The Pratts sleeping with Janice in the photo, and another photo of The Pratts sleeping with Stephen goofing around in the photo. More pictures shown of Lou posing in the river, Daniel sleeping in his bed, Fran sleeping with Spencer posing, and another photo of Janice going all supermodel posing while she's in bed. Holly thinks the photo of Janice posing in bed is amazing. In confession Lou thinks Salley using his camera to take photos of his time in the jungle is amazing. More photos shown of Torrie & Mrs. Blago trying to get Fran to stay and a photo of Fran leaving the jungle. Salley comments of the photo Lou & Stephen having some fun and Lou's belly before the weight loss. More pictures of Stephen with a head shot, one of Stephen brushing his teeth, and a photo of The Baldwin Brothers together. Mrs. Blago comments on more photos as we see photos of Janice sunbathing & the river. Salley said in confession the reason why he brought the camera was that he knew going into the jungle would be an amazing experience but he wanted to show everybody else what an amazing experience it is. We see the final photo of Salley standing in the river. The camp was happy to see the photos while Lou commented that he looked that flabby before getting into the jungle. Lou said yes.
Commercial Break 8
Back to the hosts as they hype "finale week". The hosts mention that even though the Celebrities are "roughing it" in the jungle. They missed their kids. And time still moves on in the jungle as Father's Day approaches.
Back at camp. Lou hugs Holly because it's Father's Day and he would had hugged his kids. Everybody at camp said "Happy Father's Day" to Lou. Holly gives her dad a "Happy Father's Day" in confession. Lou mentions to the camp this is the first Father's Day in 11 years that he's not near his kids. In confession Lou was thinking about Father's Day coming for the past week and he has never left his kids in this amount of time. The camp says "Happy Father's Day" to Salley. In confession Salley misses his daughters. Torrie (RD: In a black bikini top. Damn!) reads a scroll saying that since it's Father's Day Lou & Salley will be taking to their families via Skype. In confession Sanjaya wished he could speak to his dad on Skype, Mrs. Blago says she has never missed a Father's Day with Mr. Blago but she thinks the challenges in the jungle will make her strong for the future ahead. Salley's first on Skype and he's talking to his daughters as they say "Happy Father's Day" to him. The camp gather around the laptop as Salley's daughters seen how much he has lost weight. Salley said in confession getting the Skype call was the greatest thing ever. Salley's daughters want him to come back soon and Salley smiles and smiles over his daughters. Lou's next as he talks to his wife Yvonne and his baby once again. Yvonne says "Happy Father's Day" to Lou. Lou is almost crying during this Skype call. Lou wants Yvonne to hug the kids saying that they are the greatest thing he has ever done (RD: Greater than "Young Guns"?!?) and the best thing he has ever done is be their father. Lou professes his love to his family while Yvonne wants him to win the "jungle crown."
Back at camp Salley is thinking while in confession he's thinking about his kids. Lou is starting to cry while in confession he admits that he misses his family but they know why he's there. Lou also admits that when he does win the show that his family will be by his side.
Back to the hosts as they recap Lou's & Salley's emotional Father's Day experience. The hosts once again that they are doing this for charity. But now it's time. "Thunderdome" is here. (RD: "Two men enter, One men leave!" "Two men enter, One men leave!")
Back at camp where it's raining. The hosts enter the camp soaked due to the rain and the camp mock them for it. Myleene mentions that it's elimination time and mentions there's a catch to it being the "Thunderdome". Damien mentions that since Holly was eliminated before she must enter the "Thunderdome". (RD: Hrm...What if Holly is taking the place of Stephen Baldwin. Remember "Thunderdome" was supposed to be the two Celebrities with the lowest votes.) Damien then mentions the Celebrity with the lowest votes going up against Holly in the "Thunderdome" is...Salley. Salley gives a "WTF" look to the hosts. Salley admits in confession that he's shocked he doesn't have the public vote as he thought he did. The camp is shocked that it will be Holly versus Salley in the "Thunderdome". (RD: Be lucky it's a safer version of the "Thunderdome" because in the real one we had chainsaws, axes, and all sorts of plunder!) Myleene mentions the "Thunderdome" mantra of "Two men enter, One men leave!" Lou mentions that the whole "Thunderdome" concept is crazy. Salley says in confession that he may had been voted into the "Thunderdome" it doesn't mean he's not going out without a fight. The camp give Salley & Holly their blessings if one of them do leave. Mrs. Blago quotes "300" by saying to Salley "Come back with your shield, or on it!" (RD: Hey! I do the movie references around here!) Holly & Salley are packing up, said there goodbyes, and they head off to the "Thunderdome". (RD: If you guys see Tina Turner or Mel Gibson, tell them hi from me!)
Holly & Salley enter "Thunderdome" A.K.A. "The Last Chance Saloon". Damien talks to Holly & Salley about "Thunderdome" being the last Trial they will ever compete for one of them. Holly says she knows what it feels like to be eliminated before now everything is on the table. Salley doesn't want to talk about it. Damien mentions a quiet Salley is a competitive Salley. Here's how "Thunderdome" works. There are 5 rounds and each round contains a "drink" that they must swallow. The first one to finish their entire drink and show an empty mouth wins a round. Win 3 rounds and you survive the "Thunderdome" while the loser gets killed. (RD: Or in this case eliminated. Whatever.)
"Thunderdome" BEGINS! The round 1 drink is a "Grasshopper Cocktail" made up of blended grasshoppers & crickets. The hosts gave them the countdown of swallowing their drinks. Holly & Salley are drinking pretty fast but Holly slammed her glass on the table and open her mouth first winning the round and giving Holly a lead of 1-0 in the "Thunderdome". Myleene is impressed with Holly drinking it so fast. Holly thanks college for her experience. (RD: Asher Roth is right. Holly "Loves College". I wonder if Holly "Loves Women"? Hrm...) Round 2 drink is a "tarantula teaser" which is blended tarantulas. The hosts gave them the countdown of swallowing their drinks. Holly & Salley are drinking pretty fast but Salley just gets the drink done and his mouth open in a second before Holly. The "Thunderdome" is now tied 1-1. Round 3 drink is a "Dung Beetle Daquiri".
Commercial Break 9
Back to the "Thunderdome" where its a 1-1 tie, whomever wins 3 rounds survives the "Thunderdome" while the loser gets killed. (RD: Or they could break a deal so they can "Spin The Wheel" to see what punishment will be inflicted. I hope its "Pardon!") Round 3 drink is a "Dung Beetle Daquiri". The hosts gave them the countdown of swallowing their drinks. Holly & Salley are drinking pretty fast. It's close again as Salley somehow beats Holly by a second yet again making it 2-1 Salley in the "Thunderdome". Salley & Holly are having bad reactions to the "Dung Beetle Daquiri". Round 4 drink is a "Scorpion Sunrise" with a dead scorpion chaser. The hosts gave them the countdown of swallowing their drinks. Holly & Salley are drinking pretty fast. Holly basically downs the drink in one gulp making it a 2-2 tie. Whomemver wins Round 5 survives the "Thunderdome". Holly said it tasted pretty stingy while Salley belches. The fifth and final Round drink is "Chili Coladas" which is blended hot peppers into a glass. (RD: Oh that's going to hurt someone!) The hosts gave them the countdown of swallowing their drinks. Holly & Salley are drinking pretty fast. Both of them look like they finished at exactly the same time so it looks like a "Photo Finish". The review of the tape showed Salley slamming his glass first and showing his mouth. By barely a milisecond, John Salley survived the "Thunderdome"! Holly Montag is now dead, or eliminated, whatever! Holly is grateful for returning to camp but she knows she has to go. Salley goes back to camp and Holly goes home.
Meanwhile! The camp wonders who survived the "Thunderdome". Lou & Torrie say in confession that whomever wins, Mrs. Blago or Sanjaya may be heartbroken because their friend will be gone.
Salley walks back into camp surviving the "Thunderdome". Lou congratulates Salley, Mrs. Blago was smiling to see Salley. Salley explains to Lou & Torrie the ordeals he had to go through in the "Thunderdome". Torrie says in confession seeing Salley was a delight but she is sad that Holly is gone and mentions that Holly was a fierce competitor. Salley goes back to his bed to light up a cigar while Sanjaya mentions that missing Holly isn't that bad, just a temporary break up in the relationship. (RD: It's Official! Sanjaya definitely got some "Sweet, Sweet Lovin' Down By The Fire" from Holly. Before he was all "Wah! I want Holly back". Now it's "Pfft. Whatever. I'll see her again!" Doesn't mean that Sanjaya could still be "Bi" though.)
Back to the hosts as they are near camp & recap Salley's victory in the "Thunderdome". But the surprises keep on coming. A Double Elimination is around the corner and "America" gets to choose which ones they want to keep in the game. The hosts mention if "America" have any problems decide who to vote for, well they have something to show for you.
At camp where Torrie mentions in confession that (RD: In my own words.) "business is about to pick up." Salley mentions that Mrs. Blago is the toughest so we get a video package of Mrs. Blago's highlights including: her eating the tarantula, the men giving her Immunity, & surviving the second week elimination. Sanjaya mentions in confession that Salley is a great competitor. We see a video package of Salley's highlights which include: Salley trash talking to Fran in order to survive the "Rocky Horror" Food Trial, Salley trash talking to Torrie in the "Walk The Plank" Luxury Trial, messing with Sanjaya's head, winning the role as Leader, being really pissed when the women beat them in a Food Trial, and celebrating his countless wins in Trials. Torrie says that Lou is a threat because he's so fit and Salley says he's one hell of a competitor. We see a video package of Lou's highlights which include: Lou working out, Lou hanging around in the Immunity Trial, Lou getting his hand bitten over & over again by "rats", Lou winning the "Up In Arms" Immunity, and Lou trying to eat the tarantula. Salley mentions to Torrie jokingly in camp that as long as they don't feed Torrie they can beat her. We see a video package of Torrie's highlights which include: A camera staring at Torrie's "jungle infected" gut, Torrie Body Slamming Sanjaya, Torrie working out, Torrie's ordeal in the first Immunity Trial, Torrie transferring puzzle pieces, Torrie sawing a log with Mrs. Blago, Torrie surviving the "Head Of Horrors" Food Trial, and Torrie standing proud. Torrie asks what are her faults. Lou said her fault is beating her. Video package of Lou kicking Torrie's ass over and over again in Trials. Torrie said in confession that they are going to get beat by a girl. Salley then says that he's surprised that Sanjaya lasted this long. Lou said in confession that Sanjaya is just being himself. Video package of Sanjaya's highlights which include: Sanjaya crying over his dead grandfather, Sanjaya hugging Lou, Sanjaya winning the "Tunnel Of Terror" Food Trial, Sanjaya getting Immunity in the first week, and Sanjaya eating all sorts of gross stuff. The Celebrities mention in confession that each of them will win.
Commercial Break 10
Back to the hosts as they are about to enter camp and tell them about the Double elimination. The hosts enter camp making some small talk to the Celebrities. The hosts mention that nobody is going home tonight but tomorrow there is going to be a Double elimination. Since they are "Live" (RD: Memorex or hulu for me.) the hosts are going to give each of the Celebrities a chance to speak to the viewing public on why they should stay.
Sanjaya's reason: He's outlasted everyone, gone head first into a tank filled with creepy crawlies, drank a cow's intestine smoothie, & gone shopping on a tightrope. He's worked hard. And he deserves to be "King" because he's the baby.
Salley's reason: Being "King" means he has strength, and strength you have will. He used his strength & will to protect the camp. He's been very resourceful. He didn't take from the jungle but he gave back to it. He deserves to be the "King Of The Jungle."
Mrs. Blago's reason: In the last 22 days she has: almost drowned in a river, bitten by a tick, ate a tarantula, and had Janice strapped to her back. But the important thing is that she's earned the respect from her camp mates. Which is why she should win "Queen Of The Jungle".
Torrie's reason: Vote for her because this has been an incredible & tough challenge for her. She's given 100% to anything she does even if it scares her. And she won't go down without a fight?
Lou's reason: Much love to the family. He hopes the viewing public had a good time and he hopes they did too. He has put everything into the competition, being a good Leader, and treating his camp mates pretty well with respect & admiration. He has put his heart and soul into the Trials and he wants to win. *Elvis Pressley* "That's why I need to be the King, man. Thank you very much." */Elvis Pressley*
The hosts leave camp and the Celebrities are calling for their family. The hosts hype the Double elimination.
Next time: If they thought the "Thunderdome" was bad. It's a Double Elimination where two Celebrities are home and the remaining three go to the finals!
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